


how to be a heartbreaker

by aseaofsound



Category: Harvest Moon, 牧場物語つながる新天地 | Story of Seasons
Genre: 100 Themes Challenge, Character Study, Friends to Lovers, Gen, Introspection, Male-Female Friendship, Multi, Parenthood, Unrequited Love, Wordcount: 100
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-10
Updated: 2017-02-16
Packaged: 2018-04-08 17:13:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 99
Words: 10,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4313490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aseaofsound/pseuds/aseaofsound
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A step-by-step guide by Oak Tree's resident chef and part-time playboy.</p><p>for regardless1604's 100 Themes Challenge, which can be found on ff.net.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. introduction

By the grace of my mother's devotion to her work I found myself in the hands of my grandfather. An explanation for this action had never been provided to me, nor had I ever asked.

Oak Tree Town was smaller, simpler, then; I was not. Grandfather did not so much as raise me as the fires of his kitchen and the steep hills of the mountain did. In his passing I inherited many things I'd never previously thought of as hereditary: the kitchen where we created, not burned; his culinary expertise. His entire life seemed to rest in my hands.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> although i never finished my other two 100 themes challenges i really wanted to write raeger. after scrapping many drafts of various one-shots and multichapters about him, i decided to go back to writing these little drabbles, since they're good for my fickle nature when it comes to writing.
> 
> this whole thing will be based solely on headcanon, mostly of how he was raised and his childhood growing up in oak tree. also abandonment issues. gotta love em


	2. river

ii. river/city

Unnatural resources were rare in a town as obscure as theirs. While most residents had been born and bred there, it was inevitable that they become city-dwellers seeking enrichment.

Alongside Angela and Lillie Raeger traversed through bus and train stops to the city on a daily basis. Lillie stopped at the all-girls' school; Raeger and Angela attended the city preparatory. An endless stream of people flowed in and out of his periphery, each with a destination to empty themselves into. The same journey would be made home. Only upon arrival would he wonder if his mother existed amongst the flow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its canon that Lillie went to an all-girls' school; she mentions it somewhere if you court her, i think.
> 
> out of all the bachelors/bachelorettes I believe only Angela, Lillie, and Raeger were raised within Oak Tree Town, and the others subsequently drifted there of their own accord. klaus is also a possibility but he's not in the same age group.


	3. farm

iii. farm/youth

Year-round Grandfather grew rice in the riverside paddy. After all, he'd explained, rice couldn't be bought in the empty international Trade Depot. It'd become desolate since the economy went to pieces, back when he was young.

Raeger circumnavigated the paddy else he'd be scolded for wetting his clothes. Grandfather stood in the knee-deep water, his pants rolled to his knees, still looking as dignified and debonair as the man who worked the kitchens. With a certain disregard and a slight vindictiveness, Raeger gripped his pants to his knees and immersed himself in the water.

Grandfather, dirt on his cheek, sighed.


	4. warmth

iv. warmth/affection

Displays of affection weren't uncommon in the restaurant, as it was a common date spot for those who knew about it. Raeger, waiting tables, bared witness to more than a few unsavory moments between couples of all ages. Stolen kisses, feet beneath tables; they all felt so foreign in a place as backwards and modest as Oak Tree.

Grandfather held a certain distaste for these things. He tolerated them, of course, because these people were customers who appreciated his craft. Sometimes, if a couple were especially touchy, Raeger would catch Grandfather's eye, and they'd shake heads and share eye rolls.


	5. clouds

v. clouds/weathergirl

"Have you thought about what you're going to do once we graduate?"

Lillie was quiet, her face uncharacteristically pensive. "I don't know. We're still in secondary school, aren't we? It's a little early!"

"Grandfather says otherwise." He sighed through his nose, dropping down onto the grass. Lillie followed suit. "I don't know what to do."

"It looks like it's going to rain," she said, her head thrown back, her hair brushing the ground. Raeger momentarily stopped to stare at the exposed skin on her neck, and deftly avoided her curious gaze by glancing upwards. A raindrop fell into his eye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel that once lillie grows out of her tomboy phase she lets her hair grow, but then subsequently cuts it again later in life.


	6. bells

vi. bells/popular

As was custom Raeger would await Angela at the gates of the school after the bell rang. Boys and girls clapped him on the shoulder and smiled his way while he waited. Sometimes they called out to him, spewing some kind of new inside joke they'd made in class.

Large crowds of acquaintances gathered around him, yelling promises of dares and trips to the nearest convenience store. He joined in on their joviality, despite Grandfather lending him no allowance and his shifts at the restaurant. He so relished in this feeling of community he'd forgotten Angela and traveled home alone.

 


	7. love

vii. love/Valentine's day

"You're awfully popular!" Lillie smiled, eyeing his school bag bulging with chocolate.

"Guess so." He shrugged, smiling a bit himself. Girls from all grades stopped him in the halls to offer their fancies in the form of chocolate hearts. He'd accepted every one graciously, smiling and showcasing brace-free teeth, though he knew the names of only a handful of those girls.

Angela grimaced, which was really just a light quirk of her lip. "You don't really like sweets, though."

He didn't. As they walked through the city, the burden of the chocolates became unbearable upon his shoulder. He buried the guilt and dumped them in the trash.


	8. cold

viii. cold/mother

Winter attacked in days of snowy succession. Although the trains had heaters, the metal of the seats still made him shiver. Lillie and Angela were not beside him to provide a distraction from the cold or his many anxieties about living with his mother for winter break. 

Once his stop arrived, he felt the strong grip of apprehension. He had not seen his mother in nearly a decade. Would she appreciate what she would see? Would she be proud of his high grades and popularity? Would she even recognize him? A woman, all sea green eyes and acute angles, approached.


	9. coffee

ix. coffee/charm

_Breakfast in the fridge. Coffee in the machine. I'll be home at 8._

She was gone when he woke. Every morning passed in the same manner. He missed Grandfather's cooking and dabbling in his own, Lillie's sunniness and Angela's smart quips. Some days he spent the day with school acquaintances, watching women pass them on the streets and catching them smiling at none but him. Raeger would smile back albeit shyly—just to tease the other boys—though straightaway he'd slink back to his mother's empty apartment, safe from all those eyes.

On the counter would be a coffee cup.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> raeger would be the guy all the boys wanted to be and everyone wanted to date  
> i made the implication that his mother made the coffee for him; i don't think she's heartless/doesn't care for him. she's just career-oriented, enough to have an effect on the boy at least.


	10. gift

x. gift/will

Smoke billowed out of Grandfather's nose and into the brisk air. Raeger eyed him from the kitchen, his hands moving of their own accord to create meal after meal. The restaurant wasn't busy, as it was a weeknight, and Raeger had been given the privilege of manning the restaurant—kitchen and all—while Grandfather smoked cigars. None of the patrons appeared to hold qualms about his age; if the food was good, who were they to complain?

And the food  _was_  good, they'd told him, pride swelling in his chest as he washed the dishes and closed for the night.


	11. fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which raeger happens upon Klaus

xi. fire/klaus

On the western end of town were houses that stood unoccupied for decades. Raeger himself had never ventured into that part of town, nor had he any reason to. During one of the restaurant's busier days he happened upon rumors of an apparition in one of the derelict buildings. In a fit of curiosity he gathered the courage to investigate.

The redbrick house loomed over him as if in warning. Large windows hugged its facade, though nothing could be seen from outside. The door creaked menacingly. Goosebumps scattered across his skin.

"Good evening. Do you, by chance, have a lighter?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in my hc i think that klaus would be in his mid- to late thirties in-game, making him at least ten years older than the others. generally i don't like to choose ages for characters whose ages are not specified, so ill leave it at that  
> also, now that he's older during the course of this story i think klaus will have returned home to oak tree. i kind of hc him as like a drug kingpin lmao


	12. marriage

xii. marriage/jonas&margot

Raeger's parents had separated before he could even remember his father or be upset over his absence, and Grandfather had raised his only child, Raeger's mother, alone. There seemed to be a drought in marriages in Oak Tree, with the only existing one out of a handful of adults being between Jonas and Margot. In his years of living in the small town Raeger rarely, if ever, saw them together. They were an exceptionally private couple, or, as Mr. Otmar put it, exceptionally boring.

The product, ever-uptight Lutz, bounded into Raeger in hot pursuit of Melanie. The girl grasped his hand.


	13. death

xiii. death/loss of innocence

Junior high graduation became a weary memory. He and Angela and Lillie were going their separate ways except for the fact that they lived within seconds of one another.

Grandfather hadn't attended, opting to keep business running. Veronica and Maurice shared sympathy glances, ones Raeger pretended to ignore. Little Melanie offered him a flower she'd stolen from Lillie's bouquet, which he gratefully accepted and returned to its rightful place.

He took the train alone, making eyes at a pretty girl across the aisle. She smiled and chewed on her lip.

"What's your stop?" he asked. Confident.

"Right here."


	14. lookalike

xiv. lookalike/escape

It wasn't him in the mirror of this stranger's abode. The boy in the reflection appeared too young for his mentality, with the babyish features of someone still ambling through puberty. At his side, the girl looked older—and rather miffed—though not by much. Perhaps a third year in high school, someone who knew where they're going; university pamphlets littered across the room. Raeger gathered his shirt in a panic, his stomach turning bile and the last thing he'd eaten—Grandfather's special during that day—repeatedly. He dressed and failed to stop thinking of the family photos on the refrigerator as he left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for some reason i feel like raeger would be into older women (and lillie) okay ill leave now  
> no they didn't have sex which is why the girl is so miffed. im going by japan's school system so he'd be around 15.


	15. apple

xv. apple/woman

_"If you've got an apple body shape, try these..."_

"Angela, do I have an apple body shape?"

Angela, without looking up from her textbook, replied, "No, inverted triangle."

Raeger studied the new recipes—dessert recipes—Grandfather wanted him to perfect with feigned interest. He frowned at the memory of his first foray into uncharted female territory while Lillie poked and prodded and posed before Angela's small mirror in nothing but boy shorts and a t-shirt, her newly cropped hair brushing her prominent collarbone.

The recipes lay forgotten on the floor; Raeger saw not an apple, pear, nor inverted triangle, but a girl.


	16. life

xvi. life/corona

He met Corona amidst the summer heat of the city.

She waitressed at a restaurant he and his friends frequented, where the food tasted cheap and subpar. Corona was warm, facetious, and a few years out of university, she'd had trouble finding a job; Raeger had trouble staying away from her.

He often lingered behind after his friends departed, if only to have a short tete-a-tete when her boss wasn't looking. In those few minutes they shared they spoke of food, family, anxieties for the future. Life.

She took him by the hand; he led her to an empty apartment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i truly was not lying when i said raeger/everyone i am jsut getting started


	17. night

xvii. night/morning after

As was custom during his visits, his mother left her flat deserted, rarely returning to sleep at odd hours. The air was stale before they made it there, a tangle of legs and whispers. Raeger, in his inexperience, allowed Corona to lead him.

"You're a fast learner," she breathed into his ear, touches wandering wantonly. He was thankful for the darkness of the night and the dimness of the lamp, for his blush and stammering hands went unnoticed.

When the security blanket of nighttime gave way to reality, Raeger found himself alone, a neatly folded note in his open palm.


	18. children

xviii. children/growing up

"I had sex."

Lillie's headband clattered to the floor; Angela glanced away from her homework. Was this something to share with childhood friends? Girls he'd climbed trees and shared beds with in the most innocent way possible? That night had nagged at him since his return from the city, and perhaps confessing would provide some catharsis, but Raeger felt no different.

"With who?" Lillie asked, eyes wide as saucers. Angela remained silent but coolly held his gaze.

"Someone from the city." He swallowed and tightened his fist around a crumpled sheet of paper.

_…You should grow up first, and then…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> he is 18 at this point, during his hookup with corona. a bit of a later bloomer than would be expected.


	19. sun

xix. sun/birthday

Birthdays often went by quietly in the restaurant. Grandfather, at least, never seemed to remember they existed.

Raeger spent the day off-duty and restless. He had hoped, however childishly, that he would be allowed to cook for the customers again, just this once, since he'd supposedly grown older and more experienced in the kitchen. Yet Grandfather made no acknowledgment, nor had this taken Raeger by surprise.

Despite the sun's oppressive heat, the mountain was calm with the chirping of cicadas. A fox, then Lillie, joined him hours later. In her dainty fingers was a lone sunflower.

"Happy birthday, Raeger."

"Thanks."


	20. beach

xx. beach/change

Like ocean currents, Raeger's routine remained cyclical, with slight variations between the days. School, work, cook, sleep, repeat. His stays at his mother's passed in a blur of different girls, Corona and Lillie lingering in the back of his mind. Grandfather grew ill one summer and never became well, yet he never seemed to age in Raeger's eyes.

Oak Tree changed with its residents. New tenants arrived once in a blue moon, each with a set of their own idiosyncrasies and secrets.

"I'm gonna be on TV!"

"I leave for college in a week."

A hurricane appeared to sweep through.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what i wanted to get out of this was the meaning of beach as in a "beached whale." everything around him is changing while he seems to be left behind, beached, essentially. oak tree isn't an oceanside town so i used more creative liberties.


	21. harvest festival

xxi. harvest festival/giorgio

Raeger, a late riser, had a tendency to arrive to festivals several hours late. The townspeople, accustomed to this, paid no mind to him as he stumbled into the plaza during the last quarter. He was making his way to his usual spot beside Lillie when a rose gold-haired man approached, his face and clothes exquisite.

“You’re Raeger, yes?” He spoke in a smooth, lilting voice that reflected confidence.

“Yeah,” Raeger replied, self- conscious of the juvenile crack in his voice.

“Giorgio, model and prime landowner. You served me once at the restaurant. I must say, your cuisine convinced me…”


	22. afraid

xxii. afraid/departure

“I leave tomorrow.”

“When will you be back?”

“I’ll be home for New Years.”

“It’s April, Lillie.”

“I know. I’ll miss you, Raeger. Here’s my number. Call me every once in a while, okay?”

“Yeah. Of course.”

It did not occur to him to ask her to stay. If not for her family, Raeger hardly believed she’d remain in obscure little Oak Tree just for him, yet a part of him hoped she had at least thought about it. About him. About the time they’d spent growing up together.

The following day Raeger slept in. He could not say goodbye.


	23. hate

xxiii. hate/confession

Before she departed, Angela had said, simply, forcefully, "Call her."

Angela was a girl—woman—of few words. These words replayed in Raeger's head, swirling and swallowing every thought. He stared, eyes at half-mast, at the telephone that'd barely seen much use in the life of the restaurant.

"Try that." Giorgio pointed to a tall bottle. "Mango wine. I'm sure your grandfather wouldn't mind. You're more than old enough."

Yellow, like Lillie's favorite color. His, too. The wine was sweet, deceivingly so, for he woke the next morning hungover and hung up. The message he'd left never met a reply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mango wine is raeger's horror gift. i love drunk confessions, but i couldn't exactly fit the confession here. we can assume raeger doesn't remember what he even said.
> 
> also giorgio was joking; at this point raeger is not of age yet, but who really waits until then?


	24. birth

xxiv. birth/maturity

Maturity must come eventually.

Since graduation, Grandfather had been relentless in cultivating Raeger's culinary talents. Though free from the confines of the classroom, Raeger's education was far from finished. Grandfather would rouse him before noon for neither of them was a morning person, and the kitchen would be their mainstay, only leaving for short breaks. Raeger, in his newfound aloneness, embraced his grandfather's harsh tutelage. It gave him less time to think of Lillie and the mistake he had made of calling her, drunk nonetheless.

In his ailing health, Grandfather officially left Raeger everything—his restaurant, his habits, his work-oriented lifestyle.


	25. farmer

xxv. farmer/elise

"Looks like they're clearing it up," Gunther muttered.

"Wonder what they could possibly be putting in all that space." Maurice shook his head, his face grim. "Melanie's upset. She absolutely loved it there."

Raeger gawked at the new clearing behind the restaurant, the wide expanse of land staring back at him. The whole space could probably fit Giorgio's farm. Twice.

Within the week, a young woman stepped into the restaurant, her heavy skirts swaying with every step. She took a look around the place, slightly disgruntled, before taking a seat at a table.

"Before you ask, my name is Elise."


	26. food

xxvi. food/acceptance

Grandfather died in winter.

He passed peacefully in his sleep, unlit cigar in hand. Raeger, dry-eyed, stood stiffly during the small procession held by the townspeople. Grandfather would've hated it, like he hated ceremonies and attention of all kinds, but he would've endured through their kindnesses anyway. His mother wordlessly sent him the money Grandfather left her out of obligation.

Raeger, now completely and utterly alone, threw himself into his grandfather's work, meticulously caring for the restaurant as he would an old friend. A peaceful, if morose, quiet settled while he toiled away, finding solace in cakes and rice bowls.


	27. blushing

xxvii. blushing/infatuation

"Are you open?"

A man—boy?—stood panting at the door of the restaurant, his wild red hair swaying with the gentle breeze. Raeger, in the midst of polishing tables, glanced pointedly at the  _closed_  sign in the window.

"Sorry, no. We're closed on Wednesdays..."

"Oooohhh! Just my luck!" he cried, grimacing and sliding down the doorframe. His expression changed just as quickly, however, and he stumbled toward Raeger, his face red and eyes wide. "Oh...I-I'm Fritz! I farmed a start—started a farm here!"

"My name is Raeger. I own this restaurant." Fritz gawked at him, slack-jawed. Blushing. "You're drooling, you know."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i had to


	28. sickness

xxviii. sickness/anxiety

"I'll be right there!"

When Raeger exited the kitchen, he did not expect to find someone startlingly familiar standing in the threshold. Rather, he held no expectations for any of his customers, save for his regulars: Klaus, Giorgio, Elise...

"Raeger? Is that you?"

She looked well, albeit different in traditional clothing; her hair was longer and her face fuller. Happy.

Raeger's stomach churned as he searched for the right words to say. Words, he learned, came easier when he didn't know the girl as well. Or hadn't slept with her yet.

_Did I mature enough?_

"Corona. It's...good to see you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like i take these themes very abstractly lmao oops perhaps i should've written a full-length fic after all.
> 
> to be honest i've considered it. a fic where i'd take what i'd written here and expanded on it, more details, traceable timeline. the whole multi-chapter thing, but i've never been good with commitment.


	29. fireworks

xxix. fireworks/date

Wednesday.

"Is it really that big a deal?"

"It is! Who watches the fireworks alone? No one! I bet you'd have a whole gaggle of people to watch with you!"

Raeger didn't. He couldn't deny the possibility of it, if Oak Tree's young adult population totaled more than five people. And maybe if Corona weren't married—to Gunther, who was literally Oak Tree's surrogate father, of all people. Wasn't he a tad old for her?

Fritz slumped on the counter before him, a sad grimace twisting his freckled face. Raeger sighed in resignation.

"Alright, Fritz. Stop moping; I'll go with you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> raeger's saltiness is so ironic because corona is at both sides of the spectrum: dates younger boy, marries older man. gotta love it


	30. trees

xxx. trees/truth

"Most of the trees here are oaks, unsurprisingly." Klaus traced the grooves of a tree with a finger.

Raeger stood nearby, on one of his many walks in the mountain. The ambience of the wilderness usually settled his addled mind, but its healing power appeared limited. He absently kicked at a pebble as Klaus continued inspecting trees for who-knows-what.

"I won't pry, but maybe if you talk the trees will listen," the other man said, cryptic and wise. Raeger scoffed; Klaus smirked.

"I slept with Corona." At Klaus' startled expression he continued, "When I was in high school, so, before..."


	31. harvest goddess

xxxi. harvest goddess/annie

"I should probably find a hobby." Raeger stared from the edge as Fritz toiled in the paddies, conscious not to wet his clothes or shoes.

"Why? We're having fun aren't we?" Fritz smiled cheekily, dirt on his face, while Raeger sighed. "Have you met Annie yet? She's our new resident farmer." At this, Raeger, shrugging, began walking away in the assumed direction of her farm. "Don't go sleeping with her, now!" He resisted the urge to strangle Fritz with his scarf.

At the pond he stopped, eyeing a young woman as she threw perfectly edible produce into the unperturbed waters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a pun on the theme: oak tree's not particularly religious. the harvest goddess, to raeger, could be interpreted as annie, who throws offerings to the actual harvest goddess.


	32. books

xxxii. books/homecoming

Angela, home at last, did nothing but throw herself into her work.

Her return was a quiet one; Raeger was utterly unaware of her presence until he needed it, after nearly slicing a finger off. He barely stepped into the clinic when a sizable book came hurtling toward his head.

"Angela? When—"

"You called  _once_ , Raeger, over the past several years."

He gawked at Angela's rage, something he'd never seen in the many years he'd known her. She waited, as if for an explanation, before storming past.

"She never called, either." Surely Lillie wasn't so occupied she couldn't call herself?


	33. necklace

xxxiii. necklace/innuendo

"Are you okay?"

He glanced up into Annie's large, concerned eyes as he stumbled to his kitchen. She stood a mere breath away from him as she peered at the bruises around his neck, innocently fretful.

"Yeah, I'm fine. You're here early, y'know. I'm not even open yet."

"But it's one o'clock and you open at eleven." Her gaze once again flitted toward the string of contusions. "Are you hurt?"

He sighed through his nose, his head pounding. No, just hungover. "I guess you could say that."

"Um, Raeger?"

"Yeah?"

"Maybe you should put some clothes on?"

"...I probably should."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> annie doesn't make the connection. i hc her as a fairly sheltered girl who believes all people are well-intentioned. naive, but it works in a town as wholesome as oak tree.
> 
> or does it?


	34. serenity

xxxiv. serenity/calm before the storm

Despite the tumult of Raeger's relationships, Oak Tree remained a quiet, unassuming town. Social conflagrations were sparse, both Angela and Raeger too preoccupied to address all things Lillie in her absence.

In Annie's presence the town seemed to expand in every way possible; the economy was steadily stabilizing, earning him new customers and people to converse with. The farmer soon became a regular herself, coming at awkward intervals, but always when the restaurant was close to empty. Exhausted by her daily routine, she had an affinity for falling asleep while he cooked. The silence of her patronage was almost reassuring.


	35. so what?

xxxv. so what?/noncommittal

"I'm gay."

Without looking up from the stove, Raeger replied, "...Okay."

"That's it? That's all you have to say?" Fritz laughed, then, full of relief. "Wow. I lied. I think I'm bisexual."

"Okay." Raeger set down a plateful of food, which Fritz immediately dug into.

"God, this is  _amazing_! I think I'm in  _love_ ," the farmer gushed before shoveling more food into his mouth. Raeger quirked an eyebrow but said nothing, opting to wipe down the counters for the nth time.

Minutes, or hours, later, Fritz rubbed his mouth clean, patting his stomach in satisfaction.

"Raeger."

"What?"

"I love you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fritz, in my headcanon and therefore in this fanfic, is bisexual. he was just trying to get a reaction out of raeger, but he fails miserably. i believe raeger already suspected as much.


	36. marathon

xxxvi. marathon/reunion

Lillie. Was. Everywhere.

Ever since she began her career as a local weather girl, televisions seemed to crop up in every establishment in town. Raeger couldn't go a day without hearing her name or seeing her face to the point of being pressured into purchasing a small TV for the restaurant.

Angela sat beside him, just before closing, eyes trained on the girl in yellow. "I'm proud."

"I know," he joked.

"...of her."

Lillie smiled sunnily into the camera as she spoke of incoming rainstorms. Raeger, entranced by her and the nostalgia of the moment, replied, "Me too. I'm sorry."


	37. quietude

xxxvii. quietude/comfort

Raeger had never been close to Miss Eda. More out of respect and obligation than actual sentiments he attended the funeral held in her honor.

Fritz was a quiet crier, much to Raeger's surprise. The farmer squeezed a hanky to his nose, rarely if ever coming up for a shaky breath. As Fritz's proclaimed best friend, Raeger felt compelled to comfort him with a one-armed hug and a meal, free of charge. He did not, under any circumstances, expect to end up in bed with him. Fully clothed and reticent, no words were exchanged. A few simple touches were enough.


	38. flower

xxxviii. flower/lillie

"I heard Granny Eda passed, so I came home." Lillie smiled almost remorsefully, peering into the mug of tea in her hands. Raeger nodded, his fingers stiff and unsteady despite the heat from his own drink. "It's really good to see everyone again."

"Why didn't you ever call?" Beating around the bush would get them nowhere, yet he still found it exceedingly difficult to be upset with her.

"I didn't know what to say," she blurted. "I care about you a lot, Raeger—"

"I'm not mad." He astounded himself with the sincerity of his words. "It's...nice to have you back."


	39. light

xxxix. light/effortless

He and Lillie lapsed back into a comfortable—if delicate—friendship. She was back for good this time, since her work only took her to the city. "Like when we were kids," she'd said. Her relationship with Angela remained close as ever; if anything they were closer, as all the time the both of them spent free from work went to one another.

"Aren't they sweet?" Annie sighed, smiling wistfully.

"Who?" he asked.

" _Who_?" He looked at her blankly only to be answered with another bewildered stare. "I thought you were like, super close. Angela and Lillie. They're together."

Oh.

OH.

" _Shit_."


	40. spring

xl. spring/pining

"It's the season of romance."

"Is it?"

"I thought you'd appreciate it more, you being you."

"Me being me?"

Marian laughed, but it sounded more like cackling to Raeger. "Little mister romantic! Yes, you."

"What? Why—"

"Please." Marian's voice dropped a few octaves, becoming more ominous with every word. "Corona. Lillie. I don't think you give our Angie enough credit."

"She told you—"

"She didn't. I suppose I'm just that keen on reading into her short phrases, and you're not exactly discreet with staring, I'll have you know." Raeger rubbed the space between his brows. "They're taken. You'll be alright."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sure marian would have many sources of gossip besides his own skills of perception. angela doesn't talk much, but i suppose he'd pester her until she let something slip. perhaps klaus hinted toward raeger's summer love in a conversation with giorgio or marian. scandals spread fast in a little town.


	41. turmoil

xli. turmoil/lonely

Raeger, for the most part, was accustomed to living on his own. Silence was easy; taking care of himself was, too. The old townspeople, on the other hand, were not so given to independence. They did not conceal their worries well when he conversed with them; he may be alone, but he never felt lonesome. Really, he assured them.

Quelling these concerns was not as effective when the restaurant emptied for the night, leaving him solitary and yearning. As Angela and Lillie grew closer, they and Raeger grew apart, and he could no longer lie to himself.

Or by himself.


	42. pumpkin

xlii. pumpkin/offering

There was something to be said about the many varieties of pumpkin dishes Raeger could create despite his inherent distaste for them. Although a fall favorite, they were essentially a summer crop, a fact that made no sense to Annie, the amateur farmer she was.

And in turn, Raeger could make no sense of her, either.

While kind and considerate, she possessed a penchant for throwing objects, quite literally, into the pond, a startling if not mildly offensive act to most. If he were to be honest with himself, he didn't necessarily care much.

The pumpkin slipped through his fingers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> raeger doesn't like pumpkins.
> 
> the villagers warn against throwing things into the river and don't really acknowledge the existence of the harvest goddess, so i guess they might also see it as littering.


	43. annoying

xliii. annoying/scheming

Raeger stopped short at the sound of giggling filtering from the restaurant area, his date nearly topping into him. He found Fritz and Annie huddled in the corner of the room, apparently unaware of his presence.

"Don't mind them." He sent them a glare as he led her to the kitchen. The girl marveled at his state-of-the-art cooking utensils, and he thought her cute, despite her plain-jane looks. "Do you want to try cooking something?"

"I don't know...I'm not any good, anyway," she laughed sheepishly.

A loud intake of breath, then, " _Fritz! Stop!_ "

He smiled ruefully. "Can we talk outside?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fritz schemes to make sure all of raeger's dates fail. annie watches from the sidelines, amused yet somewhat worried. i feel like the two of them often hang out at the restaurant during wednesdays, even though it isn't open. fritz, because he is raeger's self-proclaimed best friend and also because of his infatuation, and annie as moral support. for fritz or for raeger, who knows. probably both.
> 
> oh well, it's not like raeger and this girl were going to work anyway. if you've seen the flower events this should be self-explanatory.


	44. nothing

xliv. nothing/flavor

"This doesn't taste like anything. Annie—you try!"

"I think it does taste like something, it just has a very subtle flavoring. I like it."

"Thanks, Annie."

"Hey, let me try again. Yeah that tastes like my taste buds. Wait, can you even taste your taste buds?"

"No, Fritz, you can't."

"Really? I don't know—mine taste like...like...nothing?"

"Describe nothing to me. Either of you."

"...I suppose you could say—wait! Is there meat in this? Oh my god—"

"Annie, relax. It's tofu, and I rarely use meat in any of my dishes."

"Right. Right, of course."

"Anyway, it still tastes like nothing."


	45. stuffed animal

xlv. stuffed animal/grownup

He woke to the sound of trash bags hitting the cobblestone streets. His clock read 7:30 am, a few hours too early. Upon glancing out the window he spotted Melanie hauling trash bags double the size of her tiny frame onto the pavement. Raeger counted the years and found that he did not, in fact, know how old she was.

"Melanie, what're you doing? Do you need help?"

"Hello, Raeger! I don't need any help; I'm all grown up, after all!"

"Well, in that case, I'll—" a shrill squeak interrupted him.

"Mr. Fluffybunny! I could _never_ get rid of you!"


	46. worms

xlvi. worms/postmortem

Grandfather's grave stood amongst countless identical stones, indistinguishable in the sea of gray. Unlike many other graves, Grandfather's bore no sentiments, no bouquets nor seasonal wreaths, the unturned soil indicative of neglect.

Raeger shifted his weight from foot to foot, unsure of what exactly prompted him to come here. He and Grandfather never held a conversation, not that either of them made an effort to. The wind caught onto the wrappings of nearby floral accents, filling the air with plasticity.

Grandfather, alone for much of his time, led a fulfilling life; why was it so painstaking to do the same?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when i think of worms i think dead people. worms are also a catch-all term for intestinal parasites, which raeger doesn't have, but i suppose anxiety in itself is a parasite that is felt in the pit of one's stomach.


	47. fantasy

xlvii. fantasy/longing

"Have you ever thought of having a family?"

"Well, yes. I'm not as youthful as I once was." Klaus chuckled easily.

Giorgio hummed in response, taking a long sip of tea. "And you, Raeger? Young as you are, there's not much reason to now, is there?"

"Maybe not, but I can't say I haven't at least humored it, you know?" Raeger watched the flames of the stove simmer down, eyes downcast. "It'd be nice."

"Personally, I just couldn't. The fiancée and I are in an open relationship." Klaus and Raeger shared a skeptical glance. "To each one's own, I suppose."


	48. name

xlviii. name/temptation

Raeger marveled at Fritz's ability to suck him and Annie into whatever shenanigans he managed to get into. It was not as though Annie didn't enable Fritz, which Raeger felt he should chide her for, but he, too, found difficulty in suppressing the redhead's knack for spontaneity.

"Fritz...why did you think this was a good idea?" Raeger suppressed the urge to yell in frustration as the dog tracked dirt everywhere.

"What should we name him?" Fritz laughed loudly, the canine licking at his face.

"More importantly, why did  _you_  let him do this?"

Annie smiled. Saccharine-sweet. "Let's name him Komugi."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> komugi means wheat in japanese. it's what i named my dog in my game and also i'm a fan of hunter x hunter so


	49. harvest sprites

xlix. harvest sprites/mischief

Grandfather told him, once, about the lore of the mountains. These vague memories resounded in the periphery of Raeger's mind every time he spent early afternoons on the mountain, when it was especially lively. He knew of the Harvest Goddess, of course; there was not a person in town who didn't, but religion was not nearly as practiced as it may have been decades ago. While the wilderness was captivating in and of itself, the pond was the most entrancing of it all. Raeger dismissed this, believing the effect only the trick of the sun.

He tripped soundly on nothing.


	50. winter

l. winter/valentine's day redux

The door creaked and in walked Annie, face unusually downtrodden. She held a tin of cookies in her hand, offering them to him with a hint of a smile.

"Thanks." He set the tin on the counter as she sat without a word. "What's wrong?"

She rolled strands of hair between her fingers. "Fritz really likes you, doesn't he?"

"What do you mean?"

Annie stared at him hard. "You know  _exactly_  what I mean. You're not nearly as oblivious as you'd like to be."

The air sobered, then, and Raeger said, "Neither are you, huh?"

"No," she agreed, eyes watering.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote two versions for this chapter, one before i got to this prompt and one when i actually got to it; the above, the one i went with, is the latter. here is the first draft:
> 
> "Why the long face, hon?"
> 
> "Hm? Oh, it's nothing. Today's just been exhausting, is all."
> 
> Raeger remembered a naive middle schooler, accepting the hearts of myriad girls he knew nothing of. Years later he spent the holiday no differently, though he could not recall it being this tedious.
> 
> "Good-looking young stud like you, I bet you've got all these girls' panties in a twist." Marian chuckled, whimsical smile on his face. "Of course, never the one you want."
> 
> "Happy Valentine's Day, Raeger!" Annie slipped a homemade chocolate cookie into his hands before bounding off to Mistel.
> 
> "...Or maybe you do."


	51. animals

li. animals/release

Animal instincts—fight or flight in threatening situations. Raeger couldn't decide if they were applicable to this situation or if he were just being cowardly, but it was most likely the latter. Tears leaked from Annie's shut eyes, thought not a sound escaped her.

"Annie, um..." He stopped, watching for a reaction. None came. "If you want...comfort food?" How eloquent.

A ghost of a smile appeared on her face. "Do you like animals, Raeger?"

He blinked at the simplicity of her question. "I suppose."

"I find them therapeutic and easy to talk to. Would you like to come with me?"

"Okay."


	52. mermaid

lii. mermaid/resurface

"She makes me feel like I'm. Drowning, you know? When I think about her everything blurs and mutes like she's dragged me to the bottom of the ocean. That's why I avoid her. Lots of times I think I'm over it, but...it's not that simple. It never is, and I've broken up with lots of girls and rejected more...

My heart won't let me let go. That sounds awfully cheesy, doesn't it? Letting Lillie go was—it wasn't easy, but it felt natural. Not like this, and I feel like I've kept this suppressed for so long it's only gotten worse."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you never forget your first


	53. princess

liii. princess/selflessness

"Will you tell her?" Annie's voice was quiet in the barn, her long hair splayed out over the hay. Normally he would never soil his clothing like this, but he couldn't bring himself to care.

"No. I need to figure this out for myself. Plus, there's nothing I can actually do." He felt relieved to find her eyes dry. "Will you tell Fritz?"

She paused, expression distant, before shaking her head. "It'd be nice to live in a fairytale world where our feelings are returned, but...isn't that rather selfish and complicated?"

"I wish I fell for you instead."

"Me too."


	54. sleep

liv. sleep/stubborn

Sleep was for the weak.

Raeger muttered this under his breath between curses as he worked. Sweat trickled from his hairline to his jaw, his vision blurry and mind incoherent. The time was only mid-afternoon, though it seemed ungodly in Raeger's delirious state.

"This isn't what I ordered." The customer, an outsider, stared pointedly into Raeger's eyes.

"What? Oh shi—sorry. Yes, I'll be right back!" His legs dragged him back to the kitchen, where he all but slammed the dish down onto the counter in his stupor. Losing sleep over matters as trifling as love was not good for business.


	55. town

lv. town/ennui

It had been several years since he'd ventured into the city, but Raeger did not miss it. The hustle and bustle proved the populace alive, but the place itself almost felt lifeless.

He stepped off the subway as people swirled about. An old acquaintance had invited him to a gathering, a reunion of sorts, of some friends from high school. They spoke of times, old and new; of university; of the future. Raeger laughed appropriately, and when prompted, said of his love life, "It's complicated." His skin prickled; the townspeople speaking of these same matters was not nearly as stifling.


	56. fish

lvi. fish/learning

"You ever fish, Raeger?"

The river was placid today, the effects of winter slowly ebbing. Spring would arrive in a matter of days.

"No, but Grandfather taught me."

"He taught you everything, didn't he?"

"Well, yeah. He did raise me." Everything he knew about life came from Grandfather; the subjects he learned in formal education were rather insubstantial, only filling up space in his brain.

"What else did he teach you?"

Fritz was oddly...chatty today. "How to cook. To play piano. To run a business. Y'know."

"How to be a heartbreaker?"

"What?"

The air soon filled with Fritz's laughter.

"Nothing!"


	57. challenge

lvii. challenge/coming out

Raeger furrowed his brow, thoughts pacing a mile per second. Before him, Lillie paced the whole room per second.

"I'm—we're—adults, so...I don't know why this is so hard." Lillie's fingers shook with the sheer force of trepidation. Just looking at her filled Raeger with the premonition of impending doom.

"I'm sure they know already. Do you honestly believe they'll love you less?"

"I don't know!...I guess you wouldn't either, huh...?"

"Because I've never been with a man, or because I don't have parents?" An apology etched into her face, a mildly amused smile on his. "Don't. You'll be fine."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> raeger keeps it real and straight with everyone except himself, it seems  
> a note on this, since it seems to be confusing: what I meant here was Lillie referring to Veronica and Maurice ("they"), not Maurice and her mother because her mother is, well, absent. or dead. i don't know. veronica and maurice aren't together.  
> the collective "we" refers to lillie and angela.


	58. gold

lviii. gold/self-worth

"Good business," Grandfather once said, "begins with a basic understanding of people and their desires. It's up to you to know what they want."

A glance in the mirror and a taste of his cooking brought him to the personification of Grandfather's ideals. Smiles played right and recipes carried out to perfection got him what he needed out of his customers, and, admittedly, in the case of several women, more than he bargained for.

He wanted to believe that money was dispensable and not of utmost importance. That he had more worth than a set of fortunate genes and talent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in the end, he is his grandfather's son. money is fundamental and vital to the restaurant's success.
> 
> i don't believe raeger has self-worth issues. he's quite confident, but on occasion he may question the reason behind his apparent "value." i think he's made peace with being reduced to an image and therefore uses it to his advantage. sometimes he wants to believe people like him for more than his looks and food, but at the end of the day it doesn't really matter to him anymore.


	59. mines

lix. mines/word association

"You wanted to take your mind off things, right?"

"Well, I mean...this isn't exactly what I had in mind," he said, gesturing to the deep crevice in the rock wall.

"Oh." Her face fell slightly, though it seemed the wold had fallen along with her as guilt seeped in.

"But...I could try it, you know?" He gripped the hammer clumsily, discomfort settling in as he hoisted it up with both hands. Annie chewed on her lip as she suppressed giggles. "What?"

"I just never thought you'd look awkward doing anything. I'm sorry."

Soft laughter and a possibly apologetic grin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> these are things he's come to associate with annie


	60. starry night festival

lx. starry night festival/parting

He slowly trudged over to Annie's side, though what he was delaying, he didn't know. Huddled in an oversized coat, she stood on the edge of the plaza. Peculiar. She was never quite alone whenever he saw her.

She breathed into her hands before speaking. "It's freezing. The sky's beautiful but a little hard to appreciate given—"

"Are you all right?"

Voice growing infinitesimally smaller, she replied, "He's moved on. To Agate."

Oh. "...I'm glad."

"Me too." A sigh, traced with wistfulness; hands gripping his arm and a head on his shoulder. "He shines so brightly. He'll make her happy."


	61. ore

lxi. ore/possibility

A large, dog-eared binder sat in his lap, the warmth of tea and the tranquility of Annie's home offering comfort. He continually flipped its pages, eyes wide in amazement at the array of objects she'd learned to create. Like a recipe book, but not nearly as ephemeral, and much more substantial.

He stopped at a page marked with a heart, a crude drawing of a ring and a post-it adorning the page.

 _'Materials:_ ,' it read, _'fluorite, silver ore; f_ _or a special ? someone'_

"What're you looking at?" she asked, peering over his shoulder.

"Nothing!" He snapped it shut, ears red.


	62. shop

lxii. shop/expectation

Oak Tree's pride and joy lay in its now highly profiting Trade Depot, but that was not to say the native establishments blurred into the backdrop of the town's newfound prosperity. The townspeople still often dropped by Mistel's antique store, Gunther's carpentry, even old man Otmar's tiny general store.

Raeger circled the stands at the plaza, looking out for any products with which he'd had yet to experiment. He found none, however, and left with a lone jar of seaweed at the subtle beckoning of the vendor.

The bell chimed as he walked into Otmar's store. A flash of blue—


	63. blue feather

lxiii. blue feather/biding

Otmar's stock had always consisted of motley goods, the likes of which varied immensely in function. Fresh carrots, animal medicine, old tools, blue feathers—

"Anything caught your eye? Oh, I'm not getting any younger. It's the blue feather, innit?" Otmar smiled, his eyes shrewd for a man of his age. "Who's the lucky girl?"

"There is none!" Raeger laughed uneasily, fearing he answered too quickly to be convincing.

"Back in my day, we didn't do this dilly-dallying unlike you kids. You just asked and hoped for the best!" He huffed; a whistle through his teeth. "You're not getting younger, either!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> updates will have to slow down some (more) since school's starting soon


	64. clothes

lxiv. clothes/pretense

"Why did you ask me to come here again?"

"Because you need new clothes."

"Why?"

Giorgio stopped, abruptly so, Raeger nearly toppling into him. People swarmed about, muttering curses at the pair.

"Well, I hear you're getting married."

Raeger felt the blood drain from his face, the dank air growing colder. "Where did you hear that? I'm not even—" Giorgio would not be hearing it, apparently, as he continued to swagger through the city streets. They stopped, thankfully, at a casual—albeit expensive—store.

"Well, you still need to look good."  _Smack_. "That pretty face will only get you so far."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> giorgio smacks him in the face just because he can


	65. eyes

lxv. eyes/wanderlust

He wondered, however briefly, minutely, whether he were missing out.

Oak Tree was home, hidden, obscure to most excepting a little more than paltry population aware of its existence. He opened the restaurant, made small talk along with appetizers and entrees, watched people fly in and out.

If he could, he reasoned, he would not go to the city. Too congested, too fast-paced; no, if he could perhaps he'd pack his bags and travel aimlessly, finding tiny worlds not unlike his own in the crests of beaches or seclusion of islands.

"It's not much, even now, but it's home. Enough."


	66. sky

lxvi. sky/limitless

"Don't you think you work too hard?"

A laugh—scoff?—then the swish of Annie's footsteps. "That's funny. Coming from you. Why?"

He felt it was his turn to scoff. "You've licensed all the fields here. I've heard way too much about it from the other three." Conspiratorially, just because he could—"I hear they're plotting your downfall."

She poked him; either she used excessive force or she was just that strong, he didn't know, but it almost felt wounding. "I would just rise up again. Like a geyser, no?"

He smiled; she did, too. "I don't doubt it. Not for a second."


	67. nature

lxvii. nature/departure redux

He didn't find it odd people seemed to seek him during times of crisis; for cooks and barmen alike this was part of the job.

Angela did not frequent the restaurant. Raeger couldn't remember the last time they had a conversation, as friends. Growing up and apart was natural, yet when it came to Angela and Lillie, it wasn't.

"You didn't stop her?"

Angela gave him a look, one he hadn't seen since they'd done homework together and he'd asked something foolish, making him bite his lip anxiously.

"It's who she is. I wouldn't ever take that away from her."


	68. rare

lxviii. rare/one in a million

Kamil was not a wanderer.

"Not anymore, at least." He sipped his tea, eyes downcast. Raeger pretended to busy himself with scrubbing the dishes, for Kamil grew uncomfortable over periods of silence in conversation. "I return in a week."

"Are you excited?" Raeger asked, his back still turned to the other man.

A soft, almost imperceptibly wistful sigh could be heard, then, "Of course. Coming here wasn't a once in a lifetime opportunity, really... just a hunch."

"Lillian must be really supportive of you." Lucky, Kamil was, quiet smile on his face.

"She is. A once in a lifetime girl."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> recently ive fallen back in love with cam after like four years of not playing tott (because i lost it oops) because of this one fanfic that utterly destroyed me: broken by gimmeabreakxd. please read it if you haven't already it got me out of my writing rut because its so inspiring.
> 
> i wanted him to be more like he was in tott and honestly if he were i probably wouldve dropped raeger and married him instead but they chose to make him "smooth-talking" when he was initially socially awkward and introverted. i'm forever salty.


	69. price

lxix. price/counsel

 _Will I regret this?_  was not something that crossed his mind as he sat down to sit with Corona, blissfully oblivious as she was. He despised the fluttering in his stomach, the sweatiness of his palms as she greeted him.

"What did you want to ask me about?" she asked after they were through with pleasantries and skirting around words.

"Do you think I've grown up?"

Like memory foam, her brow crinkled in confusion. Ageless. "What do you mean?"

His throat might cave in. Any second now. "Otmar's selling blue feathers. I think—I think I should buy one."

"For whom?"


	70. kiss

lxx. kiss/instinctual

For whom. For you. For me. For anyone in this gilded, minuscule world who'd offer him some form of security, whether it be in polite smiles or hot, fervent hands—

No, he decided. He'd done enough running for the rest of his life. Fatigue took hold, though he trudged through the wilderness with an abnormal amount of zeal that could rival Fritz's when he ate, or Lillie's when she was on camera, or—

Annie. Dirt smeared on her cheek, grass stains on her apron, suspicious splotches on her dress.

"Will you marry me?" He resolve very nearly faltered. "I—"

"Okay."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wish i could've written more and, you know, included the kiss scene i had in mind, but that's a story for another time.
> 
> i think annie and raeger are very alike in many ways, at least the way i made her to be in this fic. they are both romantic souls, though annie perhaps acting more on impulse than raeger, who is more careful. i threw them together because i believe they both need someone to love and for someone to love them, lonely souls as they are.
> 
> i also wanted to get a more traditional HM marriage not unlike those seen in a wonderful life or some of the older HM games, where you never really dated, per say, but you just formed a bond that gradually developed into something slightly more than platonic. in small towns i imagine the people feeling the need to settle down young without intricacies like love. marry your best friend and all that, though more in a literal sense. let the romance develop, get the marriage over with now.
> 
> though i think raeger's thought about annie in that slightly more than platonic way already.


	71. mother

lxxi. mother/phone call

"Mom. Hi. It's Raeger. How are you?

I'm honestly doing really well. I got married, can you believe it? ... Her name's Annie. She's ... everything I could ever want. And more, really. I think you'd love her, because she's self-sufficient and independent and smart ... Aren't those the things you've always valued the most? I think Grandfather would've loved her, too.

Anyways, we're expecting. I thought you'd like to know and maybe visit sometime, if you're not awfully busy. Meet the grandchild, or something like that. She's due in the summer ... I hope you'll come see us, then.

Bye, Mom. Call if you have time."


	72. tragedy

lxxii. tragedy/narrow

As the seasons passed, the grass grew greener, the mountain more lively, Annie increasingly larger and weaker. Neither of them worried too much, preoccupied with their careers as they were (Raeger had asked others to at least keep an eye out for her), until difficulty rose in getting up in the morning, in walking. Stubborn until the last moment, Annie's hands grasped him so tightly he was sure she'd break a bone. Angela, in that laconic yet reassuring way of hers, pushed them apart, squeezing his arm before disappearing behind the curtains.

Piercing cries, hushed whispers, a ragged chuckle.

Relief.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i always found it odd that you don't know you're having twins until they're actually born. like what kind of messed up medical practices, though in writing i kind of attribute this to this game taking place in some decade long ago or in a universe with mostly outdated technology. i mean really. no ultrasounds? that's a problem waiting to happen (that did happen).


	73. amazing

lxxiii. amazing/her

"They're premature."

He swallowed; it felt like knives going down his throat. "You did your best."

She remained quiet, red-rimmed eyes trained on the feeble, wriggling forms beside them, though they were soon carted away by Angela and Marian for examination.

Raeger, rarely ever at a loss for words, continued to absentmindedly make circles with his thumb on her wrist. What could he say? They were just as much his children as they were hers, yet he felt an ocean between him and them.

"They'll be alright." Her voice was firm despite the cracks in it, her fingers squeezing his.


	74. prince

lxxiv. prince/despondency

He used to believe in fairytales.

He used to believe in fairytales, but he was no longer a child, and disillusionment settled in like it'd been there all along. Sleep never came most nights, when the twins were left in more capable care—when Annie never seemed to blink or bat an eyelash, her mouth set in a hard line until nighttime arrived. It would soon be replaced with the quivering and bleeding of pure, unsullied anguish, and, try as he might, Raeger could only feebly grasp at words.

Flipping through a storybook, he could not help but think himself useless.


	75. music

lxxv. music/incongruous

She'd told him, once, in a fit of impulsivity she'd constructed a piano, though it turned out shoddy. It stood in a dark corner of their house, the legs awkward and uneven as if it were limping. He tested a key and was greeted by a low, yet shrill, sound. A hand rested upon his shoulder, then the weight of a person.

"Will you play something for me?"

 _I would do anything for you._  "I'll try."

His efforts, while admirable, nearly proved fruitless as the piano produced largely cacophonous tremors. He did, however, make her smile, and that was enough.


	76. finished

lxxvi. finished/beginning

_"Monitor their breathing patterns closely. You don't want them wheezing still by the time they're three!"_

Raeger slowly brought the apple purée with a light caramel garnish—Annie had laughed at him for that—to Percy's face, careful of any droppings on the table. Percy grimaced as the spoon drew closer, the mere idea of anything in his mouth simply appalling. Raeger refused to be discouraged, steadily closing the gap between the baby's mouth and the spoon—

In a few seconds that felt far longer, Raeger was covered in his own culinary creation as Percy cooed and snot trickled from his nose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> premature babies have a higher chance of being asthmatic. i chose the name percy because it feels antiquated like annie and raeger. it wasn't what i named my boy in my game (gideon), but i find it more fitting in retrospect.


	77. speech

lxxvii. speech/mending

"How's Annie?"

"Better."

"How're the kids?"

"Alright."

"Breathing well?"

"...Yes. Of course."

"Walking?"

Definitely not.

"Nope."

"Speaking?"

Raeger went quiet, willing the flare of annoyance away; he wished, however dumbly, futilely, that he could answer this simple question about his own children.  _Were_  they speaking?  _Why yes, of course!_ —except Raeger was not a liar, not to others nor himself, though recently he'd had trouble convincing himself of the latter.

"It's almost seven, man. Maybe you should go home early." Fritz, uncharacteristically quiet and unintentionally profound. Perhaps he should, Raeger thought, before turning the burner off and neglecting the dirty dishes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> raeger is a busybody with abandonment issues; i think it's only natural parenthood be daunting. that said, the last chapter is out of place, so i might do a little revision toward the end of this fic.


	78. trouble

lxxviii. trouble/equilibrium

At Annie's beckoning and pleading—or probably just because she'd asked—Raeger bounced one child in his arms while the other flailed in a high chair at the edge of the kitchen. Franky tugged at the hair across his forehead as if she were reminding him to cut it, and circulated between burrowing her face in his neck and pulling his tie. Raeger, however valiantly, made an effort to continue cooking an arm's length away from the stove, but the floor was soon covered with sautéed vegetables and his crumbled work ethic.

He was surprised to think he didn't mind at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> franky is short for frances. its what i named my girl in my game.
> 
> i kept it because i felt that franky was cute and informal and while somewhat contemporary, it still has a nice old-fashioned ring to it.


	79. dog

lxxix. dog/overtime

Raeger, at half-past seven, trudged up the path home; the farm whispered and creaked with the rustle of hay. He creased his brow and caught himself holding his breath as he opened the front door. The house echoed faint footfalls, then a mass of white fur and pressure on his knees. Raeger scratched Komugi's head before running up the stairs two at a time, the dog short on his heels. Curled up in her work clothes, shoes still on, hat intact, was Annie, soundly asleep, the twins lying beside her. He smiled, warmth spreading to his extremities, before joining them.


	80. glasses

lxxx. glasses/deliverance

"What're those?"

Lutz, Goddess bless him and his jealous adolescent self, went red in the face as he polished his lenses. "They're my glasses."

"Can I see?"

Raeger, as per usual, smiled to himself as he listened in on the exchange. Melanie sat across the kitchen, tapping her nails—painted blue with yellow accents, of course—on the counter. She eyed the awkward, stumbling Lutz longingly out of the corner of her eye; Raeger barely concealed laughter as Percy gawked at the pair, large guileless eyes oblivious to the puppy love unfolding before him.

Melanie released a sigh and Raeger laughed aloud.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> raeger's deliverance from ambling through young adulthood, as melanie and lutz are beginning to. i won't specify how old he is, but i like to think in these backwards-ass towns they marry young. here ill say melanie and lutz are in their young teens.
> 
> in an episode of oak tree times melanie goes to the restaurant to deliver something to raeger and lutz gets jealous. i thought id play on that here, where melanie comes to complain that lutz won't make a move.  
> perhaps lutz is jealous because melanie gives such attention to percy, who, going by the game's mechanics, looks just like raeger: effortlessly adorable, i'd think.


	81. wealth

lxxxi. wealth/memory

Upon opening the door to Grandfather's quarters, the driest air in existence assaulted Raeger's lungs, leaving him sputtering in its desolation. In all his years living alongside his grandfather, Raeger had never stepped into his room, regarding it as somewhere forbidden and infinitely private. It proved underwhelming, though he didn't expect anything spectacular. Grandfather had been simple. A bed and dresser were placed opposite one another, layers of dust hugging every surface. A drawer, slightly ajar, seized his attention. He discovered two photographs, one depicting a young woman; the other, a boy, all saturnine sea-green eyes and finely tousled hair.


	82. cooking festival

lxxxvii. cooking festival/favorite

"Nervous?"

"No," he said. Then, smiling, replied, "Are you?"

"No. Should I be?"

"Well, Fritz isn't exactly an awful cook. I have taught him a few things."

Annie hummed in response, though they both knew her confidence never wavered for one second. She rocked on her heels, hands twined behind her; and despite her small stature, Raeger could not help but think she dwarfed him on the stage.

"Gotta run. Just because we're married doesn't mean you'll win."

"Even if we weren't, don't you think you'd still choose me?"

Veronica beckoned, and before leaving Annie's side, he supposed, "I would."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> perhaps one year saffron can't make it, leaving raeger as the default understudy.


	83. nevermore

lxxxii. nevermore/fleeting

Raeger would never be sure how he came to be sitting in the middle of the barn at eleven o'clock at night, or why there was even a mirror in the barn in the first place. Annie twittered above him, waving around a pair of scissors with an inappropriate amount of valor, while he sat on a hay bale and suppressed yawns.

"How short do you want it?"

He began to shrug but felt a soft smack on his arm before he could rest his shoulders again.

"I won't take that for an answer."

"I trust you."

"Ok. Suit yourself!"


	84. delicious

lxxxiv. delicious/wake-up call

"Hi! I'm Cassie from Oak Tree Times and I'd like to ask you a couple questions for our show! Now, would you please tell me, what is it that makes your food so good? Do you use any secret ingredients? Are your recipes passed down through generations? Please do tell!"

Raeger blinked at the sprightly woman in the doorway, his eyes tingling with the remnants of sleep. She smiled expectantly at him while the cameraman glared from behind the lens, angry at the bright, oppressive sun and Raeger's bleary silence.

"Uh. I mean. My grandfather passed the restaurant down and..."


	85. notebook

lxxxv. notebook/emotion

"Cameras are expensive and you can only get them at the city, so this is the next best thing."

Annie dumped a bag, bulging with notebooks, onto his lap before settling down beside him, a single pad in her hands. "What are these for, exactly?"

"The kids. Y'know, those typical parent things. Record every single moment in their lives. Let's start with..."

"Franky's first bath?"

"Yeah, that's good...how 'bout...Percy's first nose picking!"

"What?"

"Every little thing!"

"Annie, that's ridiculous."

"It's not. Write that down. Remember that time Franky puked all over Percy?"

"Yes. She did on me, too."


	86. eternity

lxxxvi. eternity/wisdom

"Time immeasurable," Grandfather had laughed.

He rose promptly at six, wallowed in a tired stupor until nine, and mustered the energy to slip down the mountain where the restaurant awaited him, waiting to be opened at eleven sharp. There were no clocks in the restaurant, as if to assert that the passage of time were something to leave behind at the threshold, where one would, with some level of reluctance, retrieve it after a respite.

Raeger sifted his worn fingers through a bowl of flour, precise measurements and Annie—parentheses forming at the boundaries of her lips—running through his mind.


	87. gone

lxxxvii. gone/transience

The restaurant had survived all these years without a need for serious renovations; after a storm the shingles require maintenance, but the integrity of it all remained intact.

Raeger pored over recipes until his fingers went raw; the children, stepping out of their onesies and diapers slowly but surely, walked from the mold of being twins all on their own: Franky, with dispositions for their mother's stubbornness; and Percy, preferring to keep quiet, busied himself with the animals. His back to them and consumed by work, Raeger turned to find that their infantile youth had escaped them and his notice.


	88. mask

lxxxiii. mask/inertia

To say he was surprised would be an understatement, though he kept his face only vaguely roused at his mother's presence. His fingers, heavy in his apprehension, stuck in the grooves of the wooden door. He was alone in the house, Annie toiling away in the safari and the twins along with her.

Her hair hadn't changed, save for a few gray hairs which, notably, she made no attempt at concealing. The suit she wore was crisp, clean, and of a cream color, and a calm countenance dominated her expression.

Raeger never before understood how neutrals could be so cold.


	89. erase

lxxxix. erase/do-over

"What brings you here?" The question fell flat as Raeger fumbled in the kitchen, his mother sitting silently at Annie's humble dinner table. His nerves stiffened his movements while his mind worked erratically to comprehend the stranger in his house.

"You called."

"Yes, but—Mother, that was _years_ ago." Raeger could not help the venom in his tone. She remained unperturbed.

Silence hovered over the both of them, reminding him of cold mugs of coffee and nondescript words on paper, the only pieces of her he had.

"And I am here."

"It's not enough."

"Raeger." He dared not turn. "I know."


	90. school

xc. school/heritage

"They're school-aged, aren't they."

His mother peered at the few photographs there were of the children. Her expression revealed nothing, but if Raeger squinted he might see interest, a hint of mirth.

"Yes."

"I see." She contemplated something, her chin resting elegantly on her knuckles. "You should send them to the city preparatory."

"Annie and I want them to stay until they get older, and—why're you so invested, anyway?" He stared at her back—something he'd been doing his entire life, it seemed.

"They look just like you." A bout of silence, then, "I'm trying, Raeger. That must count for something."


	91. in-laws

xci. in-laws/structure

"Would you say we're lucky my parents are dead?"

He sighed, and thought that a bit too harsh. "No, it's just.."

"Why now?"

"Exactly."

Annie shifted a bit, struggling with finding the right words. "Raeger, maybe it'd be good for them. To have a bigger family, you know?"

He smiled in spite of himself. "Are you saying you want more kids? Because, I mean, I'm all for trying—"

"No, I meant your mother!" She laughed before linking their fingers together. He marveled at the way she held him, the strength of her palms. "I'm sorry I wasn't there for you."


	92. father

xcii. father/revive

"Ready?"

They'd been quiet on the train, even more so on the walk. A rush of nostalgia filled him as he beheld the school, where he'd spent years trying and failing to figure himself out. He saw a young Angela, glasses askew and her eyes half-lidded with sleep, and a miniature Lillie—all smiles and sincerity—blending with the other children.

"Papa?"

"Yes?"

"...I'm scared."

Raeger felt the corner of his lips twitch as he bent to their level. Smoothing the wrinkles in their uniforms, he said, "I know. But I promise, Mama and I will always be here when it's over."


	93. tall

xciii. tall/limit

His legs ached in protest as sweat and lethargy blurred his vision. Faintly, as if through a filter, he heard Annie's laughter and saw her running form through a veil. The hot hands of exhaustion tugged at him enticingly, seducing him into a much-needed coma. 

"Raeger, seriously? The mountain's really not that steep. We live on a mountain for Goddess' sake."

"This—is—different," he huffed, leaning on a nearby rock for support.

"Remind me to throw you into an exercise regimen once we're home."

With that, Annie threw his arm over her shoulders, dragging them both up the mountain.


	94. jerk

xciv. jerk/ambition

"I'm sorry for the trouble, Raeger, but you know Angela..."

Without a word, he shut the door to the restaurant, squinting in the dark of the winter night. Lillie shivered, her hair falling about her shoulders, face almost unfamiliar with age. Gone were the full cheeks and wide eyes, eyes he'd loved once upon a childhood.

"You're married, right? With children?"

Raeger unlocked the door to his old bedroom, dust flying every which way. He's reminded of Angela and her pronounced silence, the bitterness she harbors like a second skin.

"Lillie?"

"Yes?"

"Do you regret it?"

A sniffle, then, "No."


	95. listless

xcv. listless/pressure

"I want to take over the farm."

Raeger watched as his son fiddled with his fingers. A mask of male bravado had slipped across Percy's features over the years, though to a trained eye—or perhaps just through parenthood—he was nervous. Fearful, even, and understandably so.

"'Cause Franky won't take over, and Mom's starting to have trouble, y'know?"

"Percy."

"I've always been good with the animals and the crops, so It only makes sense—"

Raeger shut the sink with a punctuated squeak. " _Percy_." The boy flinched and he was a mirror image, a memory of Raeger's younger self. "You have time."


	96. random

xcvi. random/daughter

_"Papa, can we play in the river?"_

_"Papa, where are you?"_

Raeger nearly didn't recognize the voice as he closed shop for the night. It was gritty, yet held light cadences indicative of age. "Dad?" it said, and he wondered where time went—though a scan of his restaurant, pristine since its inception, told him everything he refused to acknowledge. "I leave for university soon."

Franky, leaning in that careless manner, stared back at him. She stood just under his chin, taller than her mother, never as emotional. Much more unpredictable.

"I know—"

—and every part of him wished he didn't.


	97. why?

xcvii. why?/free

Franky's waving figure disappeared with the speed of the train, and Raeger suppressed the urge to run after it. Annie, beside him, was a small pillar of composure and strength and willpower—all things he lacked—and if she wasn't running, he wouldn't, either. And now that miles separated him and his daughter, he couldn't help but think time a cruel mistress.

Because her name was the only thing he was sure of, he said, "Annie."

She glanced at him, askance. "Yes?"

"You think I reminded her enough?"

"Of what?"

The train was gone.

"That she needs to call home every day."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> franky is the problem child, as opposed to percy, who is more docile and takes after raeger. she is stubborn and rebellious and leaves oak tree, perhaps forever. she is the child who makes raeger doubt himself as a father, and so he clings to her for validation. then again, children leaving home for the first time is hard for many parents.
> 
> i wish i could've fleshed them out more, but with just three chapters left, this will have to make do.


	98. church

xcviii. church/eulogy

A sigh escaped through Annie's lips, slow and serene in the spring morning. She grew tulips beside their feet, and they still clung to the previous night's downpour like man clings to survival. Then—her eyes opened, the wrinkles at the corners lazily staying put.

Raeger stood by in silence. Percy toiled elsewhere, his hard work filling the air with sound and life and youth. Annie pat the hump of dirt affectionately and dropped a snow-white tulip, a final goodbye to an old companion. Raeger did the same, and spoke to the Goddess as though he'd known Her his whole life.


	99. doorway

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow it's been 3,000 years  
> i recently reread this fic in its entirety and thought that it deserved to be finished. so finished it will be. soon. eventually. yeah

xcix. doorway/posterity

Dust motes danced in his vision, blurring the edges and drowning everything into a dreamlike state. The truth of life was that all living beings would turn to dust eventually. Raeger knew this, having seen the process firsthand—his father's departure, the nondescript notes his mother left him, and Franky.

Long braid blowing in the wind as the train carried her away.

Business went on, and he stood behind the counter as his hair went silver and the restaurant remained the same. The wind chimes on the door sang, and Percy joined him in the kitchen, girls swooning after him.


End file.
